Now our passage brings our focus back to the way this all plays out in our walk, our manner of living. It simply directs husbands to love their wives and wives to respect their husbands.

Many have pointed out the difference in the directive to husbands (to Love) and the directive to wives (to respect) saying that women respond to, or need, Love and men respond to, or need, respect. I can sure affirm that respect is a primary way in which I perceive Love.

Jesus is the representative man. Just as Adam represented all people when he chose to sin against God, so in Christ we are re-created, reborn, and made righteous when we choose to believe Him for it.

When Jesus was crucified, we were crucified with Him.When Jesus was raised, we who have agreed to be reconciled to God by Him were raised as well.

Christ, we are told, gave Himself up so that His bride would be set apart, made perfectly clean (as 1 John 1:9 puts it, cleansed from all unrighteousness, which leaves her righteous), glorious, spotless, youthfully beautiful, pure, and perfect.

He did it all for His bride. He did it for her benefit so that she would be all that she was designed by God to be.

I bet there isn’t a husband here who doesn’t want that for his wife. I bet there isn’t a wife here who doesn’t want that for her husband. And that is the point of submission.

Some of us have heard the comment, meant to be humorous, “I told her I loved her when we got married. If anything changes, I’ll let her know.” Many of us who share the typical male proclivities may almost naturally think that if we provide for our wives and protect them, we are demonstrating love. But there is a far greater depth of meaning here.

As we examine these sometimes-volatile verses it is crucial that we keep our perspective. The focus of our study is now upon verses that well exemplify the reason that context must never be ignored when interpreting and applying Scripture. Doctrine built on passages severed from their context leads to a great deal of pain and division. Such teaching gives the world fuel with which to malign the word of God and the cause of Christ.

Consequently, we are well advised to ask ourselves “what is the context from which we are to approach our understanding of these verses?”

Love is not focused on self. Love is focused on others. There is no love without there being an object of that Love. Someone to whom Love is directed. Another someone, the best interests of whom are the desire of our own heart.

What Paul is doing here is helping us see the sort of conduct that best fits us as children of God. He's telling us what kind of behavior will result in the best outcomes for us.